20 and Preggy

I'm in a university. I had sex with my friend and we didn't use a condom, now I'm pregnant. I took the morning after pill but apparently it didn't work. I'm two months along now. I found out last week.

At first I was in shock. I didn't really feel anything but surprise, and it was almost funny. How could this happen? It's absurd. Then I had to tell my friend that I was pregnant and he was the father and it wasn't funny anymore. He took it really well and he's been really great about it.

The abortion is scheduled for three weeks from now. When I was talking to the father about it, it seemed so clear. It was the logical thing to do. It's not even a baby yet. I didn't think it would be this bad. But after I made my appointment, I completely broke down. I'm heartbroken. If this were a perfect world where everything would be paid for and I could finish university and have a baby at the same time, I would absolutely keep it. It's my child. I want to keep it. But I absolutely can't. It would be bad for me and it would be bad for my baby. I've also realized that my feelings for the father go way beyond sexual attraction. He's been so supportive and we've been talking so much since this has happened, I've really gotten to know him and I have serious feelings for him.

I'm just not happy. I wish things could be different. I wish I did not have to say goodbye to my baby.

Please drop your comments/opinions.